I started writing or Hollywood Jesus back in the early days in the late 1990’s. My wife at the time and I loved the movies. The movies in fact were a part of our weekly ritual for the duration of our married life and our dating life up until her death in 2019 of Pancreatic Cancer. Even during that year and a half battle prior to her death, we still found a way to go to the movies. Typically, an early matinee when the crowds were small and there was little risk of her already low immune system due to chemo being compromised. The movies for us, were still a way we experienced our love together.
When Mary Jane died it hurt. I like many others
through the history of cinema have attended the movies for an extension of
romance. There is no doubt, that over time, many relationships have been built
and marriages have taken place that were enhanced because of theatrical
experiences. Several years ago, I was even honored to be asked to do a wedding
at a local cinema. The couple and their love for each other grew and developed
over going to the movies and they could think of no other place to get
married. Yes, Mary Jane Erwin Furches
was a wonderful part of my life for over 40 years and the movies were critical
to that love. So it was that after her death, along with the advent of Covid
that my movie going experience would change. I didn’t think I would ever
experience the “romance” of movies again.
It was around 2002/03 that a Sheila Tracy Mitchell
came to a church I was pastor at as she had read my reviews on Hollywood Jesus
and wanted to meet me. It was an innocent enough gesture, but unfortunately the
Sunday she attended I was not there. Then a few years later she did come and
meet me at another church in Wichita I was pastor at, Mosaic. She had read my
reviews over the years at Hollywood Jesus and was one of several over the years
that have met me and told me they had read my reviews and writings.
As time moved on, I continued my reviews, played with
various bands including the band Big Mac Combo. It wasn’t unusual to see Sheila
at those concerts and Mary Jane, my wife and I would speak to her, and we would
have some kind exchanges. Even then, I was impressed with Sheila’s love for
Jesus, and her willingness to live a life that involved movies and was more
about building bridges than it was putting up fences.
As time passed, Sheila followed my journey with Mary
Jane’s cancer. Sheila’s father had gone through a similar story and as a
caregiver to others, Sheila knew what I was going through. She was supportive
and kind, attending Mary Jane’s last birthday party and her Memorial service
here in Wichita. While I appreciated Sheila’s faith and witness, the last thing
I wanted was to get into another relationship, I was grieving the death of my
wife and it was a process where I largely wanted to do alone.
Over time I started to get lonely, and as I got lonely, I made several mistakes in dating. The people I dated weren’t mistakes, I was the one making the mistakes and broke off each relationship. I dated one lady who as a Christian I felt the need to explore relationships and discovered that maybe, just maybe, in a rare situation Billy Crystal’s character Harry may have been a little wrong in the infamous conversation with Meg Ryan’s character, Sally regarding whether men can be friends with women. Pam and I were in fact friends and that was it. Through that process though I realized I was at the place that I wanted romance again, I wanted someone to be with.
As I processed this, I had a short list of Godly women
I would like to explore that possibility. Women holding to many of the same
values and characteristics I had in common with who could possibly be a mate or
a wife someday. It was an old school approach that dating was a kind of testing
the waters for possible long term companionship route that I chose to
take. At the top of that list was
Sheila, but I never thought Sheila in a million years would accept an
invitation to a date. I decided to test the waters though by inviting her to
dinner and of course, a movie. I was
pleasantly surprised at her answer to the request.
I could go into a ton of detail here, but will
refrain, but I will say, Sheila and I hit it off and awhile ago went “Facebook
Official” regarding our relationship. It is time to go another official though,
I’ll call this Hollywood Jesus official because Sheila initially reached out to
me because of my involvement with Hollywood Jesus, in fact Hollywood Jesus has been
about building bridges and relationships since it’s inception, but, this may be
the first time that an engagement to be married has taken place because of a
relationship started because of Hollywood Jesus, I would think most likely the
case for one of the staff writers at Hollywood Jesus. I asked her after a local
jazz concert recently, expressing to her my love for her and my desire to be
with her to love for, care for and protect. She gladly said yes.
In short, the movies, among other things have continued
to be a building block for love. Not just the love of God as promoted here at
Hollywood Jesus but in this case, also the love between two partners who have
committed to spend life together. We both realize in that, that our commitment
to the God of the Universe and His Son Jesus Christ is to be catamount in our
love for each other. We can’t fully love each other without our love for Christ
being a top priority. The concept of loving Him and loving them is not lost on
the two of us. Neither is the power of story that can bring about conversations
and understanding between two people who engage in conversation due to many
factors, including, the movies.
So it is, the work of Hollywood Jesus in this fellow’s
life continues to play a vital role in my life. I would have never imagined it
would play a role in God putting two people together, thanks in part, to the
movies,
For a companion story explaining more detail, click here.
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