There is a new movie that has been in theaters for several
weeks called Instant Family Staring Mark Wahlberg. My wife and I just saw it today, and in a
word, the movie is fabulous.
As a disclaimer from the very start, my wife and I adopted
our son Nathaniel in 1989. He came home with us on December 26 of 1989 and a
few short months later, the court decreed him as our son, and we as his
parents. We know all too well the issues that come with adoption, issues
related to long term acceptance for the child and issues as the child deals
with those issues and others for the parents. These issues don't last just for
a short while, but seemingly for the life and duration of the life of the child
and the life of the adoptive parents.
Now in the adoption process, let me make something clear.
The child who has been adopted becomes as much a part of the family as a child
who was born into the family, we know this to be true because we have a daughter
born in 1981. While our love for our two children is different, they are both
our children, just as much as if both had been born naturally within our family.
We love one just as much as the other and always will. Not to make excuses for
actions of any child, but unfortunately, just as seen in the movie, there are
those in families who sometimes due to a lack of understanding of the concepts
related to adoption.
If you haven't picked up on it, that is the themes of this movie starring Mark
Wahlberg as Pete and Rose Byrne as his wife Ellie. They portray a real couple who was involved
in a home improvements type of vocation where they take older houses, flip
them and sell them for profit. They realize they are ready for a family and
through the Foster Family process (a whole other set of issues which arise
through this process) look at the possibility of adoption. Their experiences are
displayed on screen as the couple decides to take into foster care 3 siblings
with a Hispanic background. As the
family begins to bond, they realize their desire to adopt the children.
Among the supporting cast are the children, Isabela Moner who plays a difficult 15 year old Lizzy, and her two small siblings Gustavo Quiroz and Julianna Gamiz who play brother and sister Lizzy and Juan. There are issues with each child and difficulties for the adoptive couple relating to all three children, especially the older sister Lizzy. The agency team of Octavia Spencer as Karen and Tig Notaro as Sharon provides some comic relief and a representation that even within agencies there is not always agreement. That is important for this film as it never forgets to present the important thing in the adoption process is the children.
If you haven't picked up on it, that is the themes of this movie starring Mark
Wahlberg as Pete and Rose Byrne as his wife Ellie. They portray a real couple who was involved
in a home improvements type of vocation where they take older houses, flip
them and sell them for profit. They realize they are ready for a family and
through the Foster Family process (a whole other set of issues which arise
through this process) look at the possibility of adoption. Their experiences are
displayed on screen as the couple decides to take into foster care 3 siblings
with a Hispanic background. As the
family begins to bond, they realize their desire to adopt the children. Among the supporting cast are the children, Isabela Moner who plays a difficult 15 year old Lizzy, and her two small siblings Gustavo Quiroz and Julianna Gamiz who play brother and sister Lizzy and Juan. There are issues with each child and difficulties for the adoptive couple relating to all three children, especially the older sister Lizzy. The agency team of Octavia Spencer as Karen and Tig Notaro as Sharon provides some comic relief and a representation that even within agencies there is not always agreement. That is important for this film as it never forgets to present the important thing in the adoption process is the children.
There are some who come from strict religious backgrounds
who may have issues with this movie. Instant Family follows a group of foster
parents in training as they are all looking at adoption, including single
parents, a religious family and a gay couple among others. I felt the movie presented
a loving and thoughtful presentation about what all prospective parents go
through, including adoptive parents from varying backgrounds. Again, the
emphasis is on the children and the film is quite educational in the process of
adoption as well as the things that families deal with after the process,
especially those that go through the foster care system.
The truth is this movie has its moments where you may need a
few tissues. It is emotional, but in a good way. I challenge especially adults
who are contemplating adoption to see the movie, in fact I would encourage
anyone who knows a family who has adoptive children to see the movie. From an
adoptive parent, I will tell you it is quite accurate and in many situations,
it is even more difficult than the things we see on screen. There are however,
in this life, heroes who have gone out of their way to show a child in need of
adoption that they can in fact be loved and brought into a family. It may take time for understanding to take
place but with time, and love, it can take place.
One of the things I was reminded of is how God puts families together and I
couldn't help but reflect on the passages in the Bible that talk about how God
has adopted those who follow Christ into the family of God. I loved the Wahlberg character because
although he has issues at time, his love for the children is never really
flinching and there are times that we see his willingness to stand up for and
be protective of the children, even in ways that may bring about harm to others.
I can't help but think that in some ways, God is like that with those He calls
his children. In those situations, we can all experience the feelings of love
that comes from a Heavenly Father. I know that for me, in my life, I have
experienced those things and am grateful for them. I only hope that for the
duration of my life I can display this type of love to my children, including
my son, who is as much a part of me as my daughter. It's kind of hard to
explain, but thankfully there are movies like this that can, and do show, the ability
to love even those where there may be issues and difficulty.That ability to love others, despite differences, seems to me, to be a theme that we can all learn from with the events and attitudes in today's world.
On a scale of 1 - 10, for the two loving parents and the numbers in the word instant, where they became two that had an instant family, I give a well deserving, enjoyable 9.
One of the things I was reminded of is how God puts families together and I
couldn't help but reflect on the passages in the Bible that talk about how God
has adopted those who follow Christ into the family of God. I loved the Wahlberg character because
although he has issues at time, his love for the children is never really
flinching and there are times that we see his willingness to stand up for and
be protective of the children, even in ways that may bring about harm to others.
I can't help but think that in some ways, God is like that with those He calls
his children. In those situations, we can all experience the feelings of love
that comes from a Heavenly Father. I know that for me, in my life, I have
experienced those things and am grateful for them. I only hope that for the
duration of my life I can display this type of love to my children, including
my son, who is as much a part of me as my daughter. It's kind of hard to
explain, but thankfully there are movies like this that can, and do show, the ability
to love even those where there may be issues and difficulty.That ability to love others, despite differences, seems to me, to be a theme that we can all learn from with the events and attitudes in today's world. On a scale of 1 - 10, for the two loving parents and the numbers in the word instant, where they became two that had an instant family, I give a well deserving, enjoyable 9.
To see the trailer for the film, click on the following link or video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IUfZq3DUd3Y
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IUfZq3DUd3Y
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